How did I manage to come out unscathed?

One of the consistent themes we are coming across as we religion shop is a dislike or distrust for organized religion. Keds often asks how come I don’t refer to myself as a “recovering Catholic” or seem to have any hang ups about my faith. I also am not pretentiously Catholic and walk around with Confession Schedules in my wallet.

You would think I would be scarred. The right pieces were in place. Crucifixes up around the house, an uncle who is a priest, and my Mom has two cousins that are Nuns. We went to church every weekend, and for a while it was at 8 a.m. on Sundays, in Buffalo, during the winter. The homilies each week became more and more about the evils of abortion. The final pieces of the puzzle – both my sister and I went to Catholic universities.

But a funny thing happened. Faith and religion both ended up being really important in both mine and my sister’s life. I think part of it is that we both went to Catholic universities – she to St. Bonaventure, me to Canisius. There were chapels on campus. Mass times were convenient to a college student’s life. And the Masses were meaningful. The homilies were directed at the issues that effect a college student’s life, and faith’s place within it. The priests were approachable. College is a time of personal growth, and both St. Bonaventure and Canisius encouraged my sister and me to do just that. We got to see Christianity and it’s worldview beyond the structure of Mass and you get to see the message of the Gospel.

My parents played a big part as well. Even though Dad isn’t Catholic, he still went to Mass with us every weekend. It was a part of who we are, an important part of life, but not forced on us – and both parents were supportive. My mother did not engage in the sort of religious blackmail that many of my friends note with their parents. In a way, we learned that faith is flexible and God is forgiving by the examples we received at home.

Two common complaints about organized religion that I just didn’t encounter was their desire for money and a falling out with a priest. I was never chastised or denied access to anything for donations being too small. Even if we had issues with a priest, there were enough churches around that you could just go to another. Heck, Denis told me he was uncomfortable with Uncle Mickey’s sermons because they were too political around the 2004 election. He just went to a different church.

So, that's why I think I'm not scarred or don't refer to myself as a "recovering Catholic." Between the role it was made in my life while growing up, the reinforcement I received at Canisius and the comfort it allows me now, I think I'm a better person for it./