One of the most frustrating things about politics is that people get so entrenched in their positions that they won't give an inch because they don't want to yield their agenda even though it is probably for the greater good.
Let's take a current issue - teenage pregnancy. As it is playing out in the news right now, I won't rehash the current news story. However, I think that Roland Martin of CNN hit the nail on the head. Check out his link here.
We need to reopen discussion in this country and actually debate issues and act in the common good, without focusing on imposing. As Matt would say, we need more proposers, and fewer imposers.
Check out the link and let me know your thoughts.
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9 comments:
I'm not a big Roland Martin fan, but I agree with him on this one. As a teacher, I see teenagers every day who have made some poor choices.
Parents who don't think sex education is a good idea, they should read this article. The young lady who contracted HIV after having sex for the first time may have made a different choice if she was armed with the right information.
Parents will argue that they should be the ones talking to their children, and I wholeheartedly agree. But, with kids nowadays, more is needed.
WHY WHY WHY!!???
Why do we have to lay off of conservatives when they DO NOT PRACTICE WHAT THEY PREACH!! We had to lay off Rush Limbaugh when he was doing drugs! What's going on in this country? Americans have a RIGHT TO VET THEIR POTENTIAL LEADERS! Why do we sweep things under the rug!! I say DO NOT LET UP - KEEP THE PRESSURE ON 'EM. If they want to run for President, then the process should be excrutiating. Obama has endured every last second of it too, and intelligent Independants are watching very closely like hawks. This electio nwill be decided by THEM!
Hmmmm... very interesting. This is a very complex problem, with no clear cut solution IMO. I do agree that teenage pregnancy does need to be addressed and to often it is not. Of course I think that boys & girls need more information, but as a parent I do not want someone telling my kid, It's OK to have sex just make sure you use a condom. I know that I will be having a very open conversation to make sure that my kids understand the decisions and the consequences of their actions. Then again we all (including teenagers) have free agency.
I don't agree that children belong in the political arena. They should not be judged or put on show just because their parents have decided to go public. It wouldn't matter Democratic or Republican on that matter for me. Let's debate the issues but not pull a 17 year old into an adult political trial. Also about having her go on stage, so should her mom tell her to hide herself, that she no longer is good enough to stand with the family because she made some bad decisions? Interesting to think about.
Wow. I expected some responses but not quite so quickly.
Fred - I occasionally agree with Martin, but he always makes me think. As a teacher, you have a unique perspective. I think I go back to that many parents are abdicating their responsibilities as parents. Unfortunately, that's something you can't legislate. Instead it is one more thing we expect teachers to pick up, and even then the teachers have one hand tied behind their back.
Dan - First, welcome to my blog. I'm always hopeful for comments from new readers or lurkers. I agree that we have every right to know vet our elected officials. And I also believe it is right to have an honest discussion about the issues. We shouldn't demonize Sarah Palin or drag her daughter through the mud for Bristol's decision. I do find it hypocritical that the "Religious Right" is holding up Bristol as a positive angle. We both know that if it was one of Obama's girls they would be demonized.
That being said, I believe that we need to get back to discussing the issues and focus on solving the problems of average Americans.
Jennifer - I know you are a good parent and that you will have positive conversations with your kids. Unfortunately, there are plenty of parents that will shirk this responsibility and somehow we still need to attack the issues of teenage pregnancy. Again, I believe this is an issue that requires more discussion.
Jennifer captured a lot of my thoughts, and I can't help but notice the connection between the teen pregnancy post and the one on education: parents. You can bet my 10-year-old is already getting plenty of information on sex from mom & dad.
But for the many kids who don't have involved parents I can see the argument that more needs to be taught. But how to teach it in a responsible way? There's got to be something between "sex is fine, use a condom" and silence.
I'd begin by suggesting that the real dangers of teen sex be communicated to students in the sex ed curriculum. We look the sexually "liberated" attitude of the 60's square in the eye and call it what it is - tell the truth. And not just the truth about STDs, but also unplanned pregnancy and the huge choices that brings, as well as the higher emotional risks a sexually loose lifestyle can carry.
Consequences/risks (information) can be a powerful tool. This was done well when I was a teen in the 80's with drugs: who could forget the frying egg with the voiceover "this is your brain on drugs"? Man that had an impact - people still associatye doign drugs with "frying your brain." It also was done well with reckless driving in driver's education (the Red Asphalt films were graphic to the point of gory - but they sure caught the attention of my classmates and myself).
What if some creative filmmaker shot a true documentary that followed the lives of sexually active teens and showed the real consequences? Interview the kids afterward (was it as big a deal as you thought it would be? How do you feel about it?) If one of the kids gets an STD, interview them after they find out (how do you feel about it now? Was it worth it?). That kind of thing - paint a real picture.
Show THAT film as a major part of a sex education curriculum, and I'd be all for it.
Matt, I agree with you. There has to a line in the middle there. Unfortunately, there are so many parents that preach that sex is bad and feel that any discussion will lead to promiscuity. Or worse, don't talk to their kids about these issues in an age-appropriate manner.
The article I linked to spoke of an African American girl who contracted HIV after having sex for the first time. Or what about the girl that got pregnant after having sex once? Even if she is with a "stand up guy" what are the impacts to both? What if the relationship is unhealthy?
There is a very strong connection between the two postings. Parental involvement is so important. I know of great parents where one parent works and others where both parents work. That is not the issue. The issue for me is parents need to be active in their kids life.
However, consistent with my political philosophy how do you ensure those kids who don't have active parents avoid learning lessons the hard way? That's where the debate SHOULD be, unfortunately people get so dug into their own corners that they do not look out for the greater good.
I remember having sex education, I think it started in the 5th grade, and again in the 7th grade. Yes, I took away information from them both even if I didn't realize it at the time. I knew how my body worked and knew the if -- then answers.
My Mom reminded me constantly what the consequences were for unprotected sex, and she did NOT sugarcoat it. I appreciated that more than I can express, and I'll be sure to pass it on.
Talking with your kids and teaching LIFE lessons is our JOB as parents. Sex education is there to support us, and we need to stop being so damn politically correct in schools. Kids need to be armed with information!!
Ken, you wrote "Unfortunately, there are so many parents that preach that sex is bad and feel that any discussion will lead to promiscuity." That may be so in some cases, but just to clarify: most of the more socially conservative parents I know (which is a lot) aren't leery of public school sex ed. curricula because they don't want sex talked about at all. Rather, they believe it should be talked about at home. I know you agree with that principle as a general rule. I'm just trying to explain where some of these folks are coming from. They don't believe in keeping their kids ignorant (especially as they approach puberty), but they harbor real concerns about who's telling their kids what.
If a culture who's views on sex have been heavily influenced by the 60s' sexual revolution, and the likes of Margaret Sanger and Freud is to determine what kids are taught about sex, there's some apprehension. And for good reason, I think.
I still take your point that many kids don't have the guidance they should from involved parents, and we need to do something to help educate them. I completely agree, and I also agree that the debate should center on WHAT they should be taught. Not only (as I've already said) do I support a curriculum that encourages kids to avoid the physical and emotional dangers of casual sex, but I think a lot of more conservative parents do too. Lay out a curriculum that is heavy on explaining all the facts and teaching kids the dangers, and I predict you'll see a lot of conservative angst dissolve. I've seen this anecdotally amongst many of my conservative friends, both religious and non-religious.
There will always be folks with more extreme views to be sure, but as you've said we've reacted to extremes for too long. Time to move on from them if they won't join the conversation, and start discussing what the actual solution should look like.
What do you think a good sex ed cuirriculum should present?
Matt,
I curse you for making me think through this and actually holding me accountable for what I write (LOL).
In all seriousness, if I was designing a sex ed curriculum it would need to have a number of components.
First, you would have to explain what is happening to the kids bodies, both physical and emotional. They need to understand that the changes are normal and that the awkwardness and embarrassing momemnts will pass. Oh, and that untucking your shirt in math class can be a good idea.
Second, there will need to be a self esteem component. I am not talking about some hippie-throwback, touchy-feely sort of self esteem discussion, but something that will help kids/teens be comfortable in their own skin. This will also help address issues where kids feel forced into things they are simply not ready for yet to be accepted.
Third, a factual conversation without judgment of actions and the physical, emotional and social consequences. I realize that many kids feel they are invincible, but showing video of kids/teens just like them that made decisions and now have to deal with the consequences would help drive the point home.
Finally, I would have a discussion of artificial birth control. Again, it needs to be factual and not in the "as long as you are going to do it, use a condom" way. There are a lot of girls be placed on the pill as a legitmate medical treatment, that this is warranted.
Ultimately, it boils down to that kids need to be taught about sex. While that should happen at home, many parents simply aren't having thorough enough conversations to prepare their kids for the challenges they are going to face. Sex is not a bad thing, but all actions have consequences and that is what the kids need to take away.
I think I'm done now. You really should rent Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. Very funny.
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